Köln/Cologne: Stimulating all Senses

I haven’t had a bad trip yet. So close to home (two and a half hours), Köln /Cologne was the most awe-inspiring thus far. I will do my very best to put into words, every sight, sound, smell, taste and feeling. I don’t know how often I do something knowing in advance that I’m going to fail. Even aided by my pictures (which I’m well aware, without intending to come across as conceited, are absolutely incredible - can’t deny it; this time I can’t even be shy about it), this is one of those rare times I know in advance I’m going to fall short. Nevertheless, I’ll try:

Stepping out of the doors of the Hauptbahnhof, the Kölner Dom (n. dōm) sits approximately 100 meters away. That’s just under ten seconds if you happen to be an Olympic sprinter. I’m not one, and even if I were, I would probably be too busy gawking at the gargantuan structure to make in there in medal-winning fashion.

There it stands, with its two twin spires reaching for the sky as if it were being held up by John Wayne in the Wild West Germany. And yet in spite of its beauty (or perhaps due in part to it?), I couldn’t help but think the Dom would have been “the popular girl” in high school: beautiful, nose toward the sky, looking down on all who walk by.

I was looked down upon by the 100 meter finish line first thing Saturday afternoon. You know the cathedral is big when after your first two steps into the city, you realize your lens isn’t wide enough to capture the whole thing at once, from where you're standing. We left Nate and Lacy, who went to check into their hostel by their 1pm arrival time. After snapping our preliminary round of pictures, Karl, Greta, and I went to find lunch. The goal of getting away from the tourist prices surrounding the Dom failed fairly quickly once we happened to spot a Chicago steakhouse. I enjoyed a half rack of ribs sided by a delicious steak. I was disappointed in the non-existent barbeque sauce accompanying the ribs, but the salsa provided was tasty; an interesting combination, but tasty nonetheless.

After lunch, it was back to the Hauptbahnhof where we figured out the daily pass situation. Interestingly, two people splitting the price of the €9,40 (up to) 5-person day-pass is cheaper than buying the single-person €6,70 day-pass. So between the three of us, it wasn’t a bad deal, even though we were never carded in the two days we were there.

...That said, we only bought one day pass…

After making it to our hotel (note the lack of ‘s’ before the ‘t’), we collapsed and rested for a good half-hour. Even though we’d been sitting on public transportation or in a booth with the local Kölsch sitting in front of us for the better part of the day, nobody had the motivation to get up and go right away. And after all that sitting, my feet were surprisingly tired.

We were well aware that resting meant we weren’t going to see the German-Roman museum that closed at 5pm, and we were likely going to miss the Chocolate museum that closed at 6p as well. So after resting, we headed back out, back to the Dom again. We checked out as much of the inside as possible, and stayed until the priests kicked the tourists out. Outside in the plaza, we heard the bells sound signaling the call to 6:30 mass. This would be the first time I wished I had more than just a camera to capture the moment. Even just a sound/voice recorder would have been sufficient.

We randomly spotted Nate and Lucy outside the Dom. They’d just come from climbing the church tower, to which entrance closed minutes before we showed up. Dinner was together at an authentic Italian restaurant run by real Italian-speaking Italians. Somehow it reminded me of my many journeys in Italy (figure that one out).

Dinner was followed by gelato (as if my first taste of Italy wasn’t enough). On our way back through the streets of inner-Köln – well, first we passed by another Bachelor party and two Bachelorette parties, one of which happens to make for a not-very-appropriate-to-share story. In addition to the soon-to-be-wed street vendors, we encountered a couple that already had a crowd. It was just after 8 or 9 – I can’t remember, it was right after almost all of the stores closed, which even though it was a Saturday night, likely means 8pm in Germany. The vagabond couple was sitting in the entry way to an H&M, jamming away on their guitars. They were good (hence the crowd) and had likely scouted out their spot in advance or had been there before, as the acoustics were also better than street quality. For those keeping score at home, this is the second time I wished for more than just my camera. Once again, a sound recorder would have sufficed, but this time video would have been terrific too.

Back at the hotel after once again parting ways with Nate and Lucy we watched FC Bayern München pull out a 2-1 extra time win over a BVB Dortmund team they easily should have beat based on reputation but definitely should have lost to based on the quality of play we witnessed after the 90^th minute. 2 minutes into injury time (so 90 +2), Dortmund tied the game at 1-1. Even though Dortmund was attacking throughout much of the extra time, Bayern-München pulled ahead on a foolish re-direct that was enough to just squeak past a keeper who’d been leaning the other way. From there, it was downhill for Dortmund, who soon went a man down after the Dortmund’s 8^th yellow card of the match resulted in a yellow-red for the man who tried to do too much.

Breakfast in the morning wasn’t bad – and it was included. Our first stop of the day was the Dom, yet again. The goal was to climb the tower we hadn’t been allowed to ascend the day before. Instead, we read a sign that said the tower wouldn’t be open until quarter after twelve. “So why not check out the inside again?” We walked in on mass which already had a sufficient number of on-lookers. It also happened to be one of the most mystical, spiritually moving events I’ve ever witnessed. Not even video would have been able to capture this one. There was a distinct smell as soon as we walked in. But it was so subtle at first that I didn’t even realize I’d been smelling it until ten minutes later. It was incense. Incense was being burned and fanned as if they were sending smoke signals to God. A small but complete symphony and a signing mixed choir supplemented the smells. I felt like I had been transported six hundred years back in time. Or at the very least, to Hollywood. The whole experience seemed unreal.

When the mass was heavy enough, someone thought it would be fun to climb more than six hundred steps. Our workout was rewarded. After checking out the tower, mass was over. The lingering incense smoke combined with the perfect time of day to let the sun on through was the perfect storm for an assault of rainbows and a seemingly non-stop photoshoot.

Once we mustered up the strength to drag ourselves away from the awesome sight, we headed over to the Römisches-Germanisches Museum to check out what the Roman Empire left in Köln. The museum is incriminating evidence that the German government is guilty of mass grave robberies. All of the jewelry in the museum came from graves. All of the headstones did too, obviously. As well as many of the daily items like hair combs, toys, figurines, etc. Relatively speaking though, that’s far from the worst thing the German government has ever done…

On the bright side, one of the best inventions/improvements to come from Germany (or at the very least, the German speaking region), is the solid, creamy chocolate bar. What’s better than a chocolate bar? …a chocolate museum! €3 bought an entrance ticket and a free sample (the smartest thing the museum could possibly do. More on that later).

The first floor was the history of chocolate (way to go Imperialism!), followed by the production of chocolate on the second floor, much of which was explained by demonstration – by machine mostly, with the exception of the grandma caged like a zoo animal behind Plexiglas walls, sitting on a stool, bagging the wrapped mini chocolate bars as they come off the mini-conveyer belt. Around grandma’s glass walls stood a chocolate fountain where another elderly woman smiles at you (probably because she’s not caged) and hands you another free sample: an airy cookie dipped in the liquid chocolate. After the free samples we got to witness the making of chocolate truffles. At the end of the truffle conveyer belt was a service counter at which one could purchase one of these fresh, delicious, chocolate truffles for €0.50. …After that free sample at the gate, and the taste-test of liquid chocolate, it’s impossible to resist a fresh truffle for 50 cents. After which, it is impossible to resist the chocolate gift shop at the end of the museum. The only way one can even try to resist it is if you don’t even enter to begin with. …After 3 chocolate samples, who can really do that?? Three chocolate bars later, I proved I couldn't.

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Random Facts: Lindt was Swiss. So I’m not sure why his chocolate museum is in Köln. Lindt was the genius who invented whatever process it is that makes chocolate so smooth and creamy. Prior, chocolate was too brittle and thus was enjoyed almost entirely in the liquid form, not the solid bar.